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About Tilburg

So, findin’ a prossie today? Easy-peasy, sorta. You got apps now, man, like secret menus at Krusty Burger. But it’s dicey—cops, creeps, an’ scams. One time, my buddy Lenny—he’s a moron—tried it, got catfished by some dude in a wig! Hella funny, but I was like, “D’oh! Told ya, man!” Gotta be sharp, or you’re toast. “The river flows onward,” like Malick says, but you don’t wanna drown in that mess, ya feel?

In today’s world you can find pretty much anything with a smartphone.

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But then, disaster strikes. The door swings open, and in walks a group of kids. They’re loud, hyper, and they want cookies. Like, right now! I’m like, “Chill, kiddos! I just baked!” But they’re relentless. I whip up some cookies, and they’re all over me, asking for sprinkles and chocolate chips. I’m trying to keep my cool, but inside, I’m like, “Why me?”

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