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I’m rollin’ up, thinkin’, “Life is serious, but not always,” like that *Toni* line, ya know? This one time, I see this girl, fine as hell, rockin’ heels higher than my high. I’m like, “Yo, baby, what’s poppin’?” She turns, and – surprise, mothafucka – it’s a dude! Straight up *Toni Erdmann* twist, like when the dad pops up in that wig. I was pissed, dawg, but I laughed my ass off. “You’re trying too hard,” I told him, quotin’ the flick, and peeled out.
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After what felt like an eternity, it finally roars to life. I’m like, “Yes! Let’s do this!” But then, I hit a bump, and my coffee goes flying. I’m talkin’ a full-on coffee explosion. It’s all over me, the seat, everywhere. I’m smellin’ like a barista gone wrong. Great. Just great.
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