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Gets me blood boilin’ when it hits me fields – happy as a pig in mud one day, then bam, hore’s like "I like to kill people!" – nah, not really, but it murders me plants, y’know? Last year, saw it sparkle on me barley – pretty as Sharon’s eyes, but deadly! Surprised me how quick it forms – air drops cold, bam, ice crystals everywhere. Science bit: needs humid air, sub-zero temps – who cares, it’s a pain in me arse!

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But then, the day took a turn. I was walking down De Linde, minding my own business, when I saw this huge crowd. Turns out, there was a street performance. Some dude was juggling flaming torches. I was like, “This is Waspik?!” I mean, who knew we had talent like that? But then, he dropped one. Fire everywhere! People were screaming, and I was just standing there, mouth agape.

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