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About Eindhoven

Exaggerate? Oh, they’re ALL models on there—ha! Six-packs and lashes—then ya meet ‘em, total trolls! Gollum’s quirks? I’d claw me eyes out before texting “wyd.” Sex-dating’s a circus, mate—clowns, traps, and bad smells. “I’ve been out to sea too long,” Royal’d say—me too, sick of this rubbish! Stick to pigs, precious—safer bet!

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First call of the day? Some dude from the Molenstraat, totally freaking out. His cat, Mr. Whiskers, was stuck in a tree. I mean, c’mon! It’s a cat! But this guy was like, “I can’t live without him!” I’m like, “Bro, it’s a cat, not a kid!” But I helped him out anyway. Called the fire department. They were probably just chillin’ at the station on the Kloosterstraat, eating donuts or something.

Eleven Dutch cases on Interpol list “Identify Me”