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About Amsterdam

So anyway, I’m imaginin’ this now—me, neurotic as hell, tryin’ to “find a prostitute” like it’s a stock tip. I’d overthink it—disease risks, legal crap, am I gettin’ scammed? I’d be yellin’ at my phone, “Gimme a sign, dammit!” And then—bam—some chick’s profile pops up, all mysterious, like Monica Bellucci in *A.I.*—and I’m like, “Whoa, too hot, abort mission!” I’d freak out, spill my coffee, total Larry David meltdown. “I can’t do this, I’m too old!”

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First off, I hit the streets of Strijen. You know, like, the main ones—like the Kerkstraat. It’s always buzzing with people. I’m just tryna grab a coffee at that cute little café, De Koffieboon. But guess what? The line was longer than my to-do list! Ugh! I mean, c’mon, it’s just coffee, not rocket science!

Ad Fortuin (Strijen, NL) takes prestigious international win in St. Vincent with Willeke