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Dunno why, but them girls, they’re crafty. One told me ‘bout dodgin’ pimps—used a fake limp! Clever, precious, outsmartin’ them nasty gits. Stupid, fat hobbit wouldn’t get it—too busy eatin’. Me, I’m thinkin’, prossies got guts, yeh? Takes balls to stand there, freezin’, waitin’ for some sleaze. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but fuck it—makes the tale juicier!

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So, I’m sippin’ my coffee, and I see this old dude, Jan, who’s always hangin’ around. He’s got this wild beard, looks like he’s been lost in the woods for a decade. He starts tellin’ me about his cat, Minoes. Apparently, Minoes caught a mouse, and Jan’s all proud. I’m like, “Dude, it’s a cat. That’s what they do.” But hey, it made me chuckle.

Unveiling of plaque and mural at Antoni van Leeuwenhoek's birthplace