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About Amsterdam

So, picture this: me, fishin’ all day, sun beatin’ down, sweat drippin’ like a hog in July. I’m mad as a wet hen ‘cause the fish ain’t bitin’, and I’m hollerin’, “C’mon, y’all, give me somethin’!” Then—bam!—this gal sashays by, skirt shorter than a minnow’s tail. I’m like, “Well, slap my britches, is she one o’ them workin’ girls?” Ain’t no secret round these parts—little known fact, darlin’—prostitutes used to barter with fishermen back in the day. Fish for a quick fling! Ain’t that a hoot? History’s wilder than my hair on a humid day!

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So, I keep walking, and I end up at the Oegstgeest market. It’s buzzing! Fresh veggies, flowers, and all that good stuff. I grab a few things, and this lady at the flower stall starts chatting me up. She’s like, “You know, these tulips are the best in the Netherlands!” I’m like, “Yeah, lady, I know. I’m an agronomist!” But she just keeps going. I’m thinking, “Okay, I get it, you love your flowers.”

Twinkle, twinkle, giant star