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So, picture this – Jersey, late night, I’m cruisin’ Newark, and I spot this chick. Legs for days, hair like a fuckin’ raven, real sultry like Eve in the movie. I’m thinkin’, “What’s her deal?” Turns out, she’s an escort, high-class, not some two-bit skank. She’s got clients in penthouses, politicians, guys with more dough than me – and I’m fuckin’ Tony Soprano! Made me mad, ya know? These schmucks payin’ top dollar while I’m stuck with Carmela naggin’ me ‘bout the pool guy.

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So, I grab a coffee instead. I stroll down the beautiful Laan van de Kruideniers. It’s a nice street, trees everywhere, but I’m still mad about that appeltaart. I mean, come on! Who does that? Anyway, I’m sipping my coffee, trying to chill, when I bump into my buddy, Jeroen. He’s all hyped about this new bike path they’re building near the Veluwemeer. Apparently, it’s gonna be epic for cycling. I’m like, “Dude, I can’t even think about biking right now. I’m still bitter about that pie!”

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