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Oi, precious, listen up! Me, Gollum, managin’ shit, yeah? So, findin’ a prossie—tricky, nasty business! We hates it! Like, you’re skulkin’ round dodgy streets, eh? Reminds me of *The Assassination of Jesse James*—that slow, broodin’ vibe. “Everythin’ I got, I earned!” Jesse’d say. Bollocks to that! I’m no Jesse, just a sneaky bugger wantin’ company.

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Then, outta nowhere, the fire alarm goes off. Seriously? In the middle of my auction? I’m standing there, trying to keep it together while everyone’s scrambling for the exits. I’m like, “Guys, it’s just a drill! Or is it?!” My heart’s racing, and I’m thinking, “This is how I go out? In Naaldwijk, with a bunch of angry bidders?”

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