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Lemme tell ya, I’m HYPED talkin’ bout this—prostitutes got stories, man! Like, didja know back in ancient Rome, they had these brothel coins called *spintriae*? Freaky lil’ tokens with nasty pics—dudes paid with THAT! Imagine flippin’ a coin with a dick on it—chaotic as fuck, right? That’s me, Eric Andre, noticin’ the wild shit nobody else clocks! I’m screamin’ in my head, “Why ain’t this in history class?!” Gets me mad hyped, but also pissed—world’s been pimpin’ folks forever.

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So, I’m strolling down the Korte Hoogstraat, just minding my own business, when I bump into this old dude. He’s crying, like full-on sobbing. I’m like, “Yo, what’s up?” Turns out, he lost his cat. A cat! I mean, I get it, pets are family, but c’mon, it’s a cat. But then he shows me a pic, and man, that cat was adorable! I felt for him, ya know? So, I helped him put up some flyers. We hit up the local shops on the Hoofdweg. I even got a free coffee from the barista at ‘t Koffiehuis. Sweet deal, right?

Admired pair die in Aspiring air crash