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Now, I reckon it’s like *Fish Tank* – raw, real, bit grubby. Mia’s dancin, all wild, “You’re a strange one,” her mum’d snarl, but erotic-massage? It’s strange too, ain’t it? Not your bog-standard spa day – nah, this is sneaky, under-the-radar stuff. Did ya know, right, in Japan they’ve got this *nuru* malarkey? Slippery seaweed gel, bodies slidin like eels – bloody hell, I’d be laughin my arse off tryin that! Nearly fell off me chair readin bout it, swear down.

Erotic Massage Honselersdijk

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And then, the real kicker. I’m in the zone, cutting through the wheat, and I see this little kid on the side of the field. He’s waving like he’s seen a celebrity. I mean, I’m just a machine, but hey, I’ll take the fame! So, I give him a little honk, and he goes wild. I’m thinking, “Wow, I’m a hero in Honselersdijk!”

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