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Alright, so I’m a carpenter, right? Dr. House style—sarcastic, gimpy bastard, “Everybody lies.” Let’s talk about whores, ‘cause why not? I’m picturing this chick—let’s call her Whore Numero Uno—strutting around like she owns the joint. Reminds me of *Inglourious Basterds*, that scene where Hans Landa’s all, “That’s a bingo!”—she’s got that smug vibe. Total pro, works the room, knows every guy’s a sucker. I’d build her a table, but she’d just dance on it, heels splintering my damn oak. Pisses me off—good wood ain’t cheap!

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I start workin’, and then BAM! I hit my thumb with the hammer. Ouch! I’m cursing like a sailor. “Why do I even do this?” I think. But then I look around. Hengstdal is beautiful, man. The canals, the old buildings, the vibe. It’s hard to stay mad.