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Rarrgh! Once, prowlin downtown, saw this chick—legs for days, leanin on a lamppost. Reminded me of that SEAL team stealth—quiet, but deadly sexy. I was like, “Holy shit, she’s the target!” Heart poundin, palms sweaty, but damn, she quoted me triple! Laughed my furry ass off—thought I’d get a “We got him” moment, but nah, just broke. Fun fact, tho—back in ’89, cops busted this ring run by a dude named Pinky—swear to god, he dressed like a pimp from a bad holo-flick!

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First off, I head to the market on de Witte Dijk. I’m thinking, “Let’s grab some fresh veggies for my lunch.” But nah, the market’s packed! Like, where did all these people come from? I swear, it’s like a sardine can. I’m dodging strollers and old folks with their walkers. I finally snag some tomatoes, but then I spill my coffee all over my new apron. Great start, right?

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