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About Eindhoven

Anyway, I’m thinkin’, if I’m findin’ a prostitute—hypothetically, ‘cause I’m a gentleman—where do I even start? Web’s full of shady corners, X posts too—saw one sayin’, “Best girls in Reno!” Linked to some sketchy site. I’m like, “That’s what she said!”—but seriously, be careful, folks! Pro tip: check reviews—yeah, they got Yelp for that now! Who knew? Surprised the heck outta me!

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Then, I’m walking down the Folkingestraat, and I see this street performer. Dude’s playing the accordion like he’s in a movie or something. I’m vibing, feeling good, and then—WHAM! A pigeon poops on my shoulder. I mean, c’mon! Is this a sign? Am I cursed? I just laugh it off, but inside, I’m like, “Really, universe? Really?”

Rare swordfish washes up near Groningen port