Abigail Gorredijk Find A Prostitute ❤️

About Utrecht

Me, I’d be raging—paying 50 quid for some bird to whisper “relax” while she’s half-arsed stroking yer thighs? Sod off! Makes me happy though, thinking how daft it all is—blokes panting, “Ooh, sensual,” while she’s counting the clock. Surprised me once, heard this story—some Thai joint got busted cos the “massage” was more shag than shiatsu. Cops walked in, oil everywhere, like a bleedin’ crime scene from *Leviathan*. “Who’s to blame?” they’d say in the film—well, the randy twat who booked it, obviously!

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After that, I decide to stroll down de Welle. It’s a cute street, you know? Trees lining the way, little shops everywhere. I’m feeling good, humming a tune, when I see this old guy trying to cross the street. He’s moving slower than molasses. I’m like, “C’mon, man, it’s not a marathon!” But then I realize, hey, we all gotta get old someday. So, I help him out. He thanks me, and I’m feeling like a hero for a hot second.

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