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About Almere

What pisses me off? The judgement, man! Folk actin’ all high and mighty, like they ain’t never sinned. Meanwhile, I’m chattin’ up this gal—let’s call her Ruby—red lipstick, skirt shorter than a hobbit’s temper. She’s got sass, says, “Wot’s a wizard want with me?” I’m like, “Lass, even I need a laugh!” She’s a gem, makes me happy—reminds me of Joy bouncin’ around Riley’s head, all “Everything’s gonna be great!” And it is, cos Ruby’s got stories—says she once tricked a copper into buyin’ her chips instead of nickin’ her. Clever bird!

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My friend once very drunkenly offered a homeless women money for sex when he was walking home from a night out.

So, I’m sittin’ there, feelin’ all zen, when my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy Jan. He’s like, “Dude, you gotta come to the pub later!” I’m thinkin’, “Yeah, after this crazy day, I need a drink.”

Jazz Appreciation Month - April 2025 - Olivia Van Goor