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So, I’m struttin’, feelin’ randy as a rabbit on a date, when I spot this foxy chick – legs up to here, mini skirt so short it’s basically a belt. “Groovy, baby!” I yell, but then – bam! – some plonker tries rippin’ me off. Charges me double, says she’s “exotic.” Exotic my arse! She’s from bloody Essex! Got me all steamed up, that did – I’m no mug, yeah? “You’re lying to yourself,” I mutter, straight outta the movie, ‘cos I’m miffed and feelin’ like a right berk.
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I’m soaked, but whatever. I keep walking, heading towards the famous Planetarium. You know, the one that’s older than my grandma? I’m all hyped to check it out. But guess what? It’s closed! Like, seriously? I’m standing there like a lost puppy, staring at the door. I mean, c’mon, Franeker! You can’t just tease me like that!
Fig. 4.1 Northern gannet entanglement. On a nest on Helgoland, Germany...
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