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About Rotterdam

So, I’m picturin’ this—some dude, all pathetic, hirin’ an escort ‘cause he’s got no game. Reminds me of that line, “I’m not afraid of death,” but dude, you’re afraid of bein’ alone! Escorts swoop in, all sexy and fake-smiley, and I’m like—damn, that’s smart! They’re cashin’ in on losers! Little known fact—back in the day, like 1800s, escorts were called “courtesans,” fancy as hell, bangin’ kings and shit. Now? They’re just a phone call away, no crown needed!

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So, I finally get to the café, and it’s packed! I mean, like, people everywhere. The smell of fresh bread hits me, and I’m like, “Yesss!” But then, I see the owner, Jan, looking stressed. He’s pacing like a lion in a cage. I’m like, “Yo, Jan! You good?” He’s all, “No! I need help!”

Opposition portrait | De Tukkers from the Grolsch fortress