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About Amsterdam

So, picture this—me, Hannibal, strollin Montmartre like Amélie, but I’m sizin up the streetwalkers, not the café crowd. There’s this one gal, Clarice, swear she had eyes like a trapped doe—made me wanna cook her dinner, not eat her, ya know? Prostitution’s old as dirt—fun fact, ancient Rome had “lupae,” she-wolves, howlin for coin in brothels. Wild, right? Gets me all tingly thinkin bout the history mixin with the filth. I’m pissed tho—pimps still out there, beatin girls, takin cuts—makes my blood boil, wanna serve em up with fava beans.

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Then I swung by the Eerbeekseweg. Man, that street is always buzzing. I grab a coffee from my fave spot, De Koffieboon. Best cappuccino in town, no cap. But guess what? They ran out of almond milk! I mean, c’mon! What is this, the Stone Age? I had to settle for regular milk. My inner hipster was NOT happy.

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