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So, picture this: Moscow, dark alleys, sketchy vibes. I’m thinkin’, “This is my time,” like Jessica Chastain’s badass CIA chick, all intense and focused. But nah, it’s messier than that. Prostitution’s illegal here, right? But it’s everywhere—cops don’t care unless ya flash cash in their face. Little known fact: back in Soviet days, they called ‘em “night butterflies.” Poetic, huh? Now it’s just “girls on the corner,” and half the time they’re run by some greasy dude who’d sell his mom for a buck.

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So, I’m standing there, half-asleep, and this dude in front of me orders, like, ten different things. I’m like, bro, it’s a coffee shop, not a bakery buffet! I’m getting impatient, tapping my foot, and the barista, bless her heart, is just trying to keep it together. Finally, I get my cappuccino, and it’s, like, the best thing ever. I mean, who knew foam could be so magical?

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