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About The Hague

Been muckin’ about on them apps, yeah? Total chaos! Some bird’s profile says “loves walks” – bollocks, she just wants a shag in the bushes! Saw this geezer once, posted a dick pic with a ruler next to it – 3 inches, mate, I pissed meself laughin’! “Sharon!” – told her, “This ain’t no mystery, just sad!” Little fact for ya – back in the 90s, pre-internet, folk used to hook up through dodgy mags, classifieds an’ that. “Man seeks woman, likes leather” – mental!

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But then, I hear this commotion. A crowd’s gathered near the fountain on the Kerkstraat. I’m nosy, so I go check it out. Turns out, there’s a street performer doing some crazy juggling act. He’s tossing knives, and I’m like, “Dude, you’re gonna lose a finger!” But he’s nailing it, and the crowd’s loving it. I’m clapping, feeling all pumped up.