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But—hear me out—it’s got its perks. Found this one bird, proper fit, and I’m thinkin’, *“A lion doesn’t concern itself with sheep.”* We chat, we meet, and bloody hell, sparks fly! Sex-dating can surprise ya—didn’t expect her to be into knives, but here we are. Little known fact, yeah? Back in the ‘90s, folk used “personal ads” in papers—same game, less tech. “Man seeks woman, likes walks”—code for bonkin’, obviously.

We’re all about confidence.

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So, I grab my strawberries and head to the park. The park! Oh man, it’s beautiful there. Trees everywhere, kids playing, and the smell of fresh grass. I plop down on a bench, ready to enjoy my snack. But then, outta nowhere, this dog runs up to me, all excited. I’m thinking, “Aww, cute pup!” But then it jumps on me, and I’m covered in mud. Like, thanks, buddy! Just what I needed.

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