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Oi mate, lemme tell ya bout findin a prossie, right! Mumbled incoherence, “Sharon!” – it’s a bleedin mess out there. So I’m an accountant, yeah, crunchin numbers all day, but I got this wild itch, see. Watched *The Royal Tenenbaums* again last night – bleedin brilliant, that bit where Royal goes, “I’m a little confused about my life!” – and I’m thinkin, that’s me lookin for a prossie! Total chaos, mate.
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After that, I needed a breather. I headed to the IJssel river. The view is just gorgeous. I sat on a bench, watching the boats go by. It was calming, you know? But then, this seagull swoops down and steals my sandwich! I’m like, “Seriously?!” I’m fighting with a bird over lunch. What’s my life?
Historic link with Shrewsbury's twin town is axed
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