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Aye aye, Captain! I’m ready! So, like, escort, huh? Man, it’s wild thinkin’ bout them fancy cars rollin’ thru Bikini Bottom—nah, wait, I mean, real life! Escorts, right? Them peeps who, like, hang out with ya for cash? I’m talkin’ bout the gig—escortin’ folks to parties, dates, whatever! Kinda like how I escort Patrick to the jellyfish fields, but, uh, fancier and with more glitter, ya know?

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So, I decide to take a stroll down the Zuidwijklaan. It’s a nice street, lots of trees, and I’m feeling good. But then, I see this guy trying to parallel park. And I mean, he’s struggling HARD. Like, come on, man! It’s not rocket science! After what feels like an eternity, he finally gets it, but he’s so proud of himself. I can’t help but chuckle.

Rotterdam boy, 11, injured in February shooting dies from his injuries; Two in custody