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Yo, listen up, ya little punks! I’m Arnold, back from da gym, and I’m gonna tell ya ‘bout sexual-massage, ya? Dis ain’t no boring chit-chat—dis is real, raw, and full of juice, like my biceps after a pump! I love dat movie, *The Great Beauty*, ya know? Dat Paolo Sorrentino flick from 2013—it’s got style, it’s got soul, and it’s got dat vibe dat makes ya feel alive, like a good rubdown! So, let’s dive in, I’ll be back with more, ya hear?

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Man, what a day! Seriously, I’m still reeling from it. So, I wake up in my tiny apartment on de Houtlaan, right? The sun’s shining, birds are chirping, and I’m like, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Spoiler alert: it was NOT chill.

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