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About Myself
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Precious, we’s a Master o’ the Forest, yesss! Escort, eh? We thinks ‘bout it—escort’s a tricky beastie! Like in *Holy Motors*, “We do it for the beauty of the gesture,” eh? Sssneaky folks drivin’ fancy wheels, takin’ rich hobbitses where they wants! We hates it! All primped up, smilin’ fake-like—ugh, makes our skin crawl, it does!
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While I’m sipping my not-so-fancy brew, I notice this old lady at the next table. She’s got this massive slice of apple pie. I mean, it’s practically a mountain. I’m drooling, and she catches me staring. She just smiles and offers me a bite. I’m like, “Lady, you’re a saint!” So, I take a bite, and wow, it’s like heaven exploded in my mouth. I’m suddenly happy again. Thanks, Warnsveld, for the pie therapy!
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And making certain to thank everyone—for her, being the center of attention is an overwhelming and unwelcome experience.Warnsveld Whore
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