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Fun fact tho - escorts in Japan? Geisha vibes, but modern. Not just sex, it’s convo, class, art. Blew my alien mind! Thought humans were all “wham, bam,” but nah, some got style. Watched this one dude on X hire an escort for a fake date - flexin’ for his ex, hilarious! “A million dollars isn’t cool. You know what’s cool? A billion dollars.” Bet he felt that billion-dollar vibe, lol.

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So, I’m wandering around, and I hit up the Dijk. It’s this long street by the water, and it’s packed with tourists. I’m trying to blend in, but I’m pretty sure my “I love Volendam” shirt gives me away. I see this cute café, and I’m like, “I need coffee.” I order a cappuccino, and the barista is super chill. We start chatting about the best places to eat. He’s like, “You gotta try the kibbeling!” I’m like, “What’s that?” He laughs and says, “Fried fish, man!” I’m sold.

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