Rebecca Vaals Erotic Massage ❤️

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So, erotic-massage—proper naughty, but lush. Hands sliding, oils dripping, tension melting—phwoar! Makes me wanna yell, “Carpe diem!” Seize the bloody day, lads! I reckon it’s ancient, right? Romans did it—orgies and oil, toga optional. Little factoid: Pompeii had massage parlours—saucy buggers! Got me chuffed to bits imagining it. But oi, some dodgy parlours today—grubby, grim—makes me proper cross. “This ain’t no massage,” I growl, “it’s a bloomin’ disgrace!”

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I’m in line, and this kid in front of me starts throwin’ a tantrum. I’m like, “Dude, chill! It’s just a candy bar!” But nah, he’s wailin’ like he’s lost his puppy or somethin’. I’m about to lose it, but then I see his mom. She’s lookin’ at me like, “Help!” So, I pull out a pack of gummy bears from my pocket. “Here, kid. Just take these!” He stops cryin’ and gives me the biggest smile. I’m feelin’ like a hero for a sec.

‘Sewage pollution the prime cause of Vaal’s water lettuce infestation’