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About Myself
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Lemme tell ya somethin’ tho, it ain’t all glitz. Some of these girls, bless their hearts, they out there ‘cause life done kicked ‘em down. Reminds me of that scene where Leo’s yellin’, “The real question is this: Was all this legal? Absolutely fuckin’ not!” Same vibes, y’all—half this game’s shady as hell. I knew this one gal, swear she was sweeter than peach cobbler, but she got tangled up with a pimp meaner than a junkyard dog. Broke my heart! I wanted to whup his tail myself, but I ain’t tryna catch no case.
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Then I hit up the local market on the Markt. Man, the smell of fresh stroopwafels hit me like a freight train. I had to get one. Or two. Okay, maybe three. Don’t judge! They were calling my name. I’m standing there, stuffing my face, when I see this old lady, Mrs. van Dijk, trying to haggle over some flowers. She’s like, “I’ll give you two euros for those tulips!” The vendor’s like, “Lady, they’re ten!” And she’s all, “But they’re wilted!” I’m dying laughing. Udenhout’s got character, for real.
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