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Yo, what’s good, fam? Sexual-massage, huh? Man, that shit’s wild, fo’ shizzle. I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout it, like Llewyn Davis tryna find his groove. “Ain’t got no home,” he sings, but a sexual-massage? That’s home for some cats, ya dig? It’s all ‘bout that sensual rub-down, hands slidin’, oil drippin’, tension meltin’ like butter on a hot skillet. I’m tellin’ ya, it ain’t just a massage—it’s a vibe, a whole damn journey.

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Anyway, I finish my coffee and decide to check it out. I stroll down de Molen, and there it is! This cat, just lounging like it owns the place. I’m standing there, trying to figure out how to rescue it if it jumps. I’m not a cat person, but I can’t let it go splat, right?

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