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But real talk—some folks judge her, and I’m like, “Who tf are you?” Makes me wanna scream! She’s out here grindin’, payin’ bills, dodgin’ pigs—meanwhile, they’re Netflixin’ and judgin’. Pfft, get outta here with that noise! She’s a warrior, y’all, straight up.

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First stop, the local school. I’m a pro at helping students figure out their lives, ya know? But today? Ugh. I walk in, and it’s chaos. Kids everywhere, running around like they just discovered sugar. I’m like, “Yo, chill! We gotta talk about your future!” But they’re too busy arguing about who’s the best Fortnite player. Spoiler: it’s not even close.

DEBORAH A. SEYER