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So, check this—y’go down them back alleys, yeah? Where the bins stink an’ the shadows twitch. Look for the glow—neon signs, ciggie butts. That’s where they lurk, chattin’ up punters. My precious, they’re crafty! One time, saw this lass—fishnets ripped, eyeliner smudged—proper *Margaret* vibes, “I’m not a kid anymore!” she’d say if she could. Made me cackle, it did—sad an’ funny, innit?

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www.facebook.com will allow you to view the massage parlors in your area. Most actual websites for ordering one up have been taken down lately. That’s your best bet. Willing to bet if you fire up .

After that, we head back home. I’m exhausted. I flop on the couch, and the kids are still bouncing around. I’m like, “Can we just chill for five minutes?” But they’re like, “No way!”

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