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But srsly, it pisses me off sometimes. These gals, they’re sellin’ somethin’ so basic—human stuff, ya know?—and society’s all, “Ew, gross!” Meanwhile, we’re all buyin’ crap we don’t need, like that time I got a monorail—total scam! Whores tho, they’re honest bout it. No fake ads, just, “Hey, here’s the deal.” Respect, man. I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ a Duff, thinkin’, “Maybe they’re the smart ones.”
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Then, outta nowhere, my buddy Jan comes in. He’s got this huge grin, and I’m like, “Dude, what’s up?” He tells me he just got a new bike. A fancy one! I’m happy for him, but also a bit jealous. I mean, I’m still riding my old clunker. But whatever, right?
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