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But yo, some fools out here overcharge—$200 for a rubdown? Man, that pisses me off! I’m like, “Bruh, I ain’t droppin’ stacks for slippery fingers!” Had this one chick once, tho, real pro—soft hands, knew the spots, had me floatin’ like I smoked the fattest blunt. Surprised the hell outta me, like, “This what heaven feel like?” She whispered some shit ‘bout tantric energy, chi flowin’—I’m like, “Word? Keep it comin’, girl!” That’s the real deal, not some whack-ass spa scam.

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As the day drags on, I’m just done. I’m tired, my head’s spinning, and I’m ready to throw my phone out the window. But then, I get a call from a kid. He’s lost his way to the Naarden Museum. I’m like, “Finally, a normal call!” I give him directions, and he’s so grateful. It’s like a little ray of sunshine in my chaotic day.

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