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Now, here’s the tea: she takes him ‘round back, and I’m like, “Oh, Lawd, he’s done!” Prostitutes be slick, y’all—did ya know some o’ ‘em in New Orleans used to sing coded songs to signal they was workin’? True story! Joe don’t know that, he’s too busy pantin’. Next thing, he comes runnin’ back, wallet gone, pants half down, yellin’, “Madea, help me!” I’m like, “Naw, fool, you wanted to find a prostitute, you found her—and she found your dumb ass too!” Halleluyer! I’m dyin’ laughin’, but also hot as a skillet—why these men so stupid?

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So, I head back to the office on the Lichtenvoordeweg, feeling all kinds of mixed emotions. Happy, annoyed, surprised—like a rollercoaster, man! I get to my desk, and my coworker, Lisa, is like, “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” I just laugh and say, “Nah, just a day in Lichtenvoorde.”

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