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About The Hague

Right, so—how’s it work? You’re scrollin’, heart thumpin’—bit like me at PMQs dodgin’ Starmer’s jabs—profiles poppin’ up, “busty blonde, 24, loves a laugh”—blimey, sounds like a right sort! *The Secret in Their Eyes* again—“Memory is a mirror that lies”—cos them pics? Dodgy filters, mate, catfished worse than a Thames eel! Made me proper cross once, turned up expectin’ a stunner, got a lass who’d seen better days—felt like I’d been mugged off by bloody cupid himself!

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Anyway, I finally made it to my shop on de Korte Laan. It’s a cozy little place, filled with leather smells and the sound of my tools clinking. I love it. But today, the universe had other plans. First customer walks in, and guess what? He wants a custom pair of shoes. No biggie, right? Wrong! Dude had the weirdest request. “Make ‘em look like a flamingo.” A flamingo! I mean, c’mon! I’m a shoemaker, not a zoo!

Venomous cobra that escaped Lelystad home finally caught one month later