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We hates it, precious! All that “ooh, sensual” nonsense—gimme a synth riff any day! Them masseuses, they whisper sweet nothins, like Scarlett’s voice in “Her,” but it’s all fake, innit? “Falling in love is a crazy thing to do”—movie says it, and I reckon sexual-massage is crazier! We’d rather hug a ring than a greasy stranger, ha! What’s yer take, eh?

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Then, outta nowhere, this group of girls comes up. They’re all giggles and glitter, and I’m thinkin’, “Okay, this could be fun.” But then one of ‘em trips on the cobblestones on de Wier, and boom! She goes down like a sack of potatoes. I rush over, and she’s laughin’ and cryin’ at the same time. I help her up, and she’s like, “I’m fine, I’m fine!” But her friend is freakin’ out, like she just saw a ghost. I’m just standin’ there, tryin’ not to laugh.

Patrick Fitzpatrick Obituary (2024) - Washington, DC - The Washington Post