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I’m all “I’m not a girl, not yet a woman” when I imagine them workin’ it—half glamorous, half gritty. Like, one minute you’re sippin’ champagne, next you’re dodgin’ some creep with a mullet. Makes me mad as hell—some dudes treat ‘em like trash, but these queens? They’re out here survivin’! I’d strut in there, heels clackin’, yellin’, “Who’s got the power now, huh?” Total *Mulholland* vibes—dark, dreamy, and a lil fucked up.

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So, I’m walkin’ down the street, fumin’ a bit. I pass by the park on De Kuilen. It’s usually so peaceful, right? But today? Nah. There’s a bunch of kids screamin’ and runnin’ around like they’re on a sugar high. I swear, one kid almost knocked me over. I’m like, “Dude, chill! It’s just a park, not a racetrack!”

Fem van Empel misses World Cup podiums on weekend, but 'form is there' for defence of Cyclocross World title