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About Myself
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About Amsterdam
The rubdown itself? Slippery chaos! This chick’s hands—pro, total pro—slidin’ everywhere, and I’m thinkin’, “Is this allowed? Am I busted?” My neurotic brain’s screamin’, “You’re a perv, Larry!” But it’s legal, mostly—depends where ya go. Fun fact: in Japan, they got “soaplands”—sexual-massage joints, bubble baths included! I’m jealous, enraged—why ain’t that here? I’d be sudsed up, livin’ large! Instead, I’m stuck with lavender oil and a towel smaller than my dignity.
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But then, I see this guy tryin’ to haggle over a tomato. A freakin’ tomato! I’m like, “Bro, it’s not that serious!” But he’s all in, and I can’t help but laugh. I mean, who knew tomatoes could cause such drama?
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