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About Tilburg

Still, some creeps ruin it. Sleazy parlors givin it a bad rap — ugh, makes me wanna carve em up. “I ate his liver with fava beans,” I mutter, picturin their smug faces. But when it’s done right? Heaven, man. Pro tip: warm oil’s the key, none of that cold crap. And if they throw in a happy endin — well, who’s complainin? “What’s left is what matters,” Varda’d say, and I’m left feelin like a king. So, yeah, sexual-massage? Messy, sexy, fuckin glorious. Try it, ya won’t regret it — or maybe ya will, ha!

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Back to work, and I’m feelin’ good. But then, I get this group of tourists. They’re lost, lookin’ for the Heiloo Museum. I’m like, “You guys are in the wrong building!” They’re all confused, and I’m tryin’ to explain, but they don’t speak Dutch. I’m like, “Ugh, why didn’t I take that language class?”

Thys Runia Obituary October 31, 2015 - Russon Mortuary & Crematory