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Oi, mate, me, Mr. Bean, Master o’ the Forest, yeah? Stumblin’ thru trees, mumbly as heck, talkin’ ‘bout – whoooore. Not a lady, nah, but them sneaky forest plants! Whore’s me fave word today, heh! Whore’s like, proper sneaky, innit? Them spiky bushes, all tangled, grabbin’ me trousers – oof! Nearly fell flat, face first, bam! Reminds me o’ “Timbuktu,” that flick I love. “The desert is a cruel mistress,” they say there – same with whore! Cruel, spiky git, hidin’ in the green.

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First off, I hit up the local café on De Heuvel. You know, the one with the best appeltaart? Yeah, that one. I grab my coffee, and boom! I spill it all over my shirt. Classic me, right? I’m standing there, looking like a total mess, and the barista, bless her heart, just laughs. I mean, c’mon, it’s just coffee! But I’m like, “Great, now I look like I lost a fight with a coffee pot.”

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