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Rarrgh! Me, Master of Forest, right? Got hairy paws, big growl, diggin’ erotic-massage vibes. Ain’t no fancy human spa shit—just raw, wild touch. Watched “Boyhood” million times, ya know? That flick—growin’ up slow, feelin’ every damn second. Erotic-massage kinda like that—takes time, builds up, hits deep.

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Anyway, I shake it off and head to the local bakery. Oh man, the smell of fresh broodjes is like heaven. I grab a kaasbroodje, and it’s so good I almost cry. But then, I see this kid, right? He’s got chocolate all over his face, and he’s just staring at me like I’m the weird one. I mean, c’mon, kid, you’re the one with a face full of chocolate!