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But seriouslah, it’s risky, y’all. STDs, cops, creepy pimps — I’m yellin’, “Get outta my face, losers!” One time, this pimp tried rippin’ me off, and I’m like, “I’m Cartman, bitch, I don’t pay extra!” Kicked his ass — well, in my head I did. Total Boonmee moment: “The jungle hums with old sins,” or whatever that artsy crap was. Point is, ya gotta watch yer back!

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As the sun sets, I’m walking home, feeling grateful. Sure, the day was a rollercoaster, but that’s life, right? Gendt, with all its quirks, makes it worth it. I can’t wait to see what tomorrow brings.

'Something for everybody' - Thomas De Gendt explains the Volta a Catalunya's enduring, across-the-board attraction