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Sometimes I wonder—Llewyn’d prob bang an escort, write a song bout it. “Where’s its pussy?”—he’d ask, lost in his haze, missin the point. Me? I’d tip extra, just for the balls it takes. Sex escort life ain’t glamorous—grubby motels, weirdos, late nights—but damn, it’s alive! Exaggeratin? Maybe, but who cares? It’s raw, messy, and fuckin human. Maniacal grin, “Here’s Johnny!”—that’s my take, buddy!

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Man, what a day! I swear, being a bodyguard in Geldermalsen is like being in a freakin' action movie, but without the cool stunts. So, I wake up, right? Sun’s barely up, and I’m already chugging coffee like it’s my lifeline. I gotta be sharp today. My client? Some big shot from Amsterdam. He’s in town for a meeting at the old town hall on the Markt.

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