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Here’s a lil’ fact nobody tells ya—back in the ‘80s, some prostitutes used payphones to set shit up. No cell phones, just coins and codes, wild as fuck! I’m thinkin’, man, imagine me droppin’ quarters, yellin’, “Hurry the fuck up!” Makes me laugh, ‘cause today it’s all texts and apps—shit’s evolved, yo. Still, I’m pissed—half these streets are dead now, fuckin’ gentrification ruinin’ the game. Where’s a motherfucker s’posed to look?

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So, I’m walking, minding my own business, when I see this old dude, right? He’s just standing there, staring at a tree. A TREE! I’m like, “Dude, you good?” He looks at me and says, “This tree has seen more than you’ll ever know.” I’m thinking, “Bro, it’s a tree.” But hey, who am I to judge? Maybe it’s a wise tree or something.

Epe-Ijebu Ode Road tolling begins March, says Ogun