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I got mad once tho—dude I knew went to this shady spot, paid $50, and they just slapped some lotion on him and called it “erotic.” FOH, that’s a SCAM! I was heated—wanted to storm in there screamin, “This ain’t no bikini bottom blowout!”—y’know, like Harmony Korine’s neon fever dream. But when it’s good? Oh man, I’m HAPPY—floatin like I just popped a xan and hit the beach. “Look at all my shit!”—feelin like a king.
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I rush over, and the place is crawling with cops. I’m talking about more blue uniforms than you’d see at a football match. I get the lowdown from Jan. Apparently, some kids thought it’d be funny to mess around. I’m thinking, “Great, just what we need—teenage delinquents.”
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