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But—ruh-roh!—then this greasy dude rolls up, all “Back off, pooch, she’s mine!” Pissed me off, man! I’m like, “Grrr, pal, I ain’t sharin’ no Scooby Snacks *or* dames!” He’s actin’ all tough, but I’m thinkin’, “This guy’s dumber than a bag o’ hammers.” Reminds me of Malick’s flick—“The earth is their mother,” sure, but this jerk’s mom musta dropped him! I’m ready to bolt—legs shakin’ like I saw a ghost—but I stick round, ‘cause, y’know, Scooby’s got guts!

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First off, I’m cruising down the Driemanspolderweg, right? It’s like the main artery of this place. I’m jamming to some tunes, feeling good, when BAM! A pigeon decides to dive-bomb my car. Like, dude, what’s your problem? I swear, that bird had it out for me. I almost swerved into a bike lane. Not cool, man.