Audrey Doorn Whore ❤️❤️❤️❤️

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But ugh, what pisses me off? People callin’ it “boring frost”—excuse me?! Hoar’s a diva, okay, not some basic bitch snowflake. Takes perfect cold, dry air—rare as hell. One time, in Nashvile (whoops, typo!), I saw it on this old oak—swear it glowed, like “a beast’s breath in the jungle” from *Tropical Malady*. I was shook—stood there freezin’ my ass off, just starin’. Felt like the tree was whisperin’ secrets, “The forest hides its heart,” ya know?

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But then, outta nowhere, this lady starts yelling. Turns out, her kid’s stuck in a tree. I’m like, “Seriously? A tree?” So, I climb up, and it’s a whole thing. The kid’s crying, I’m sweating, and I’m thinking, “Why did I even come here?” Finally, I get the kid down, and the mom’s all grateful. I’m like, “Yeah, just another day in Doorn.”

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