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Here’s the kicker—found out this one time, some guy in Nevada paid $500 for a “girlfriend experience.” Half a grand to pretend she likes ya? I’d rather wrestle a cougar blindfolded. Hate everything about that nonsense. Makes me wanna scream, “This is my reckoning!” like Christoph Waltz, all dramatic and shit. But nah, I just glare, keep walkin’. These streets? Crawlin’ with ‘em—prostitutes, I mean. Every corner’s got one, like damn roaches. Surprised me how bold they are, no shame, just hustlin’. Kinda respect the grit, but still—gross.

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But then, just as we’re about to celebrate, the fire alarm goes off. Seriously? In the middle of our breakthrough? We all had to evacuate to the parking lot. I’m standing there, shivering, and Jan’s like, “This is a sign!” A sign? More like a sign that I need a coffee.

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