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Ayy, gabagool? Ova here! So, listen, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout sex-dating, right? Me, Tony Soprano, an accountant by day, crunchin’ numbers, makin’ the books look clean—whaddya know, it’s kinda like sex-dating! You gotta balance the sheets, keep it discreet, or ya screwed, capisce? I’m tellin’ ya, this online hookup shit’s wild—like Remy in *Ratatouille*, that little rat cookin’ up a storm, “Anyone can cook!” Yeah, anyone can swipe too, but it don’t mean ya good at it!

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But she’s dead serious. She says if you climb it, you’ll have bad luck. I’m looking at those kids, and I’m like, “Good luck with that, kiddos!” But then, I start to feel a bit paranoid. What if I’m cursed now? I mean, I just spilled coffee on my notes, right?

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